phil_hunter

This. Turn him over and ride him until he ends happily. You can massage his pecs at same time. That’s what I’ve done. Works fine. 

Another newbie question. I understand masseurs who provide happy endings, and I guess that masseurs who advertise that they're tops can top you when you're already face down on the table. But how does it work when the masseur makes it clear, either in the description or with a series of photos, that they're bottoms? Not clear who's massaging whom. Or maybe I just lack imagination. 😀
(Funniest thing I seen on a masseur's page: "10 years of experience massaging people all the way to horses." I have no idea what that means!)

Another newbie question. I understand masseurs who provide happy endings, and I guess that masseurs who advertise that they're tops can top you when you're already face down on the table. But how does it work when the masseur makes it clear, either in the description or with a series of photos, that they're bottoms? Not clear who's massaging whom. Or maybe I just lack imagination. 😀
(Funniest thing I seen on a masseur's page: "10 years of experience massaging people all the way to horses." I have no idea what that means!)

Thank you, everyone, for your responses. You've been very helpful. I took the advice of looking for a 30+ masseur who does erotic massage, rather than an escort, just to get started, and I've now seen Alex Neto a couple of times. He's amazing. We talked, and he doesn't care about my limitations. It felt so great to be touched again, all over. Thanks for your encouragement.

This is an important topic and one which deserves serious consideration.Thanks for raising it! 
I guess I’m having a lot more sex with different guys than someone who doesn’t do sex work so one might assume that I’d catch things. Especially because the majority of the sex I have is condom less. Most people I see don’t want to use a condom for sex and certainly in the porn I do it’s never with a condom. I think what people see on porn is what they like or want to do in sessions so that ‘no condom’ thing transfers over. Those clients that might want to use a condom because of concerns about STD’s tend to go for action that doesn’t include penetration (oral obviously doesn’t count as penetration!).
However, in the years I’ve been doing sex work I can’t think of any occasions when I’ve caught something from a client, and two occasions when I’ve caught something from another porn performer. It’s actually quite rare and in my check ups (every 3m) I’m clear. 
I think the chances of catching something are far higher when attending sex parties or sex clubs / saunas. The reason? People who do sex work are fastidious about sexual health check ups because if they catch something then they’re unable to work for 2 weeks. Guys that go to these parties and clubs are less careful and get tested less frequently.
So whatI think is that if you see a professional then it’s probably a lot safer than if you see someone off a hookup app or at a sauna or club. 
 

Thank you, everyone, for your responses. You've been very helpful. I took the advice of looking for a 30+ masseur who does erotic massage, rather than an escort, just to get started, and I've now seen Alex Neto a couple of times. He's amazing. We talked, and he doesn't care about my limitations. It felt so great to be touched again, all over. Thanks for your encouragement.

Thank you, everyone, for your responses. You've been very helpful. I took the advice of looking for a 30+ masseur who does erotic massage, rather than an escort, just to get started, and I've now seen Alex Neto a couple of times. He's amazing. We talked, and he doesn't care about my limitations. It felt so great to be touched again, all over. Thanks for your encouragement.

Thank you, everyone, for your responses. You've been very helpful. I took the advice of looking for a 30+ masseur who does erotic massage, rather than an escort, just to get started, and I've now seen Alex Neto a couple of times. He's amazing. We talked, and he doesn't care about my limitations. It felt so great to be touched again, all over. Thanks for your encouragement.

Thank you, everyone, for your responses. You've been very helpful. I took the advice of looking for a 30+ masseur who does erotic massage, rather than an escort, just to get started, and I've now seen Alex Neto a couple of times. He's amazing. We talked, and he doesn't care about my limitations. It felt so great to be touched again, all over. Thanks for your encouragement.

Thank you, everyone, for your responses. You've been very helpful. I took the advice of looking for a 30+ masseur who does erotic massage, rather than an escort, just to get started, and I've now seen Alex Neto a couple of times. He's amazing. We talked, and he doesn't care about my limitations. It felt so great to be touched again, all over. Thanks for your encouragement.

Thank you, everyone, for your responses. You've been very helpful. I took the advice of looking for a 30+ masseur who does erotic massage, rather than an escort, just to get started, and I've now seen Alex Neto a couple of times. He's amazing. We talked, and he doesn't care about my limitations. It felt so great to be touched again, all over. Thanks for your encouragement.

Exactly! ….And often is all the better because it doesn’t have the pressure of penetrative sex, either as a top or bottom. Remove that expectation and you can be more relaxed, explore different things and simply enjoy the intimacy rather than feel like you’re working towards a goal. That’s why I think massage is a great way to explore intimacy. 

What you describe is a lot to explain to a total stranger that you are hiring. An escort is there for the money; the activities that take place during the scheduled time are not a matter of life or death for the escort. If there is sex and it's good, all the better. But you should feel no pressure to perform in any particular way.
Rather than an escort, you may want to consult with a sex therapist who can help you come to terms with the reality of your sexual capabilities. As others have opined, you are not alone. As we age, most of us will experience some changes in sexual performance and stamina. Nothing to apologize for.
As for a return to physical intimacy: FABULOUS!
But you set the pace, you set the agenda that you are comfortable with. No explanations needed. Physical intimacy doesn't always have to include penetrative sex.

You say EXACTLY what you just posted here in the first paragraph.  After you've engaged and went back and forth once or twice, you write that.  
Any provider worth your money will have zero problems and will love to know that to make your experience better.  One bit of advice is find someone over 30 years old.  Generally speaking, and there are exceptions, these guys have the experience in handling all types and will make it worth every penny.  Good luck!!

I second @Jamie21’s post. Same sentiments, and I’ve seen the same clients. Pumps, orgasm without cum, cum without orgasm, difficultly reaching orgasm. You name it, I’ve seen it all. It makes no difference to me. A professional cares about you. Not your abilities, inabilities, looks, body, etc. We are here to fill a need, and we do. The pros meet you where you’re at. Don’t question what you need to bring to the table. Find the right guy (do your research) and the rest will fall into place! Good luck and have fun 

To be frank:
● if you were to top: seems like easy work for the bottom. In any event they are engaged for the hour and not per ejaculation
●if you were to bottom: 99.99999% (but really its 100%) tops wont care if you cant get hard. They are there to perform, not you. You can be the laziest bottom in the world, (a pro escort) would not complaint.
Of course a client should be considerate towards the hired provider - but there is absolutely no sexual performance expectation would be placed on the client. If you want to make them happy, $$$ is the way to go.
Anyhow always communicate if you have any health issues to watch out, for your own safety.
 

💯 Agree
Just this week I couldn't ejaculate with a provider, but we kept playing and I kept telling him "that feels good, keep going" and he kept at it and it felt great, despite the fact that I couldn't orgasm with him at that hour.  This happens to me often, but I don't give it much thought and the providers are always happy to see me again. 
Not just clients, but many older providers are in the same boat.  It's not uncommon for me to play with an escort or massuer who is wearing a cock ring, or who tells me he uses an ED pill.
Relax and enjoy.  You're human, and the best of escorts know the most about the full human condition.  Enjoy!

No decent provider will have any expectations of your performance. Honestly it doesn’t matter to them if you don’t stay hard long or you don’t shoot all over the place. What really matters is you’re a nice guy who turns up and enjoys himself. 
I do find it useful to know if you don’t cum when you orgasm, or if you might not get there (although I see that as a challenge ha ha). But none of this is of much importance to me as long as I can tell that you’re enjoying yourself….and if you are then I am too. 
Last week I saw a client who doesn’t cum when he orgasms - medical reasons. Another guy last week has a patch where his insulin is delivered (he removed the insulin line before we started but said he may need a bite to eat part way through - no problem). I had to avoid the patch area when massaging him.
Another time a client had a pump thing he used to get his cock hard - he told me about that because you could feel it under the skin. I’ve had similar with guys who had a pacemaker thing in their chest. It’s really not unusual to see clients with conditions or things that they think might be a limiting factor in how their session runs. 
I find all of it interesting and to be honest it’s kind of flattering because they chose me for their session. It’s a turn on for me to know that this person laying on my massage table or in the bed had all the providers in London to choose and they saw my profile and said ‘yeah him, he looks ok’. Then they come and enjoy themselves, leave happy and even better they book again. How awesome is that! 😊. 
Most guys doing this work for any length of time will be doing it because they genuinely enjoy the job in the way I describe. Find one of those providers, tell him what you need to for your peace of mind and then let him do his thing. Relax, enjoy yourself, explore, smile, don’t take it too seriously or over think It. I would also say I agree massage would be a good idea, it’s nice to build intimacy and is like a seduction….and you’re right about the oil! 
The previous posters @jmichaeliiiand @dbar123 both said it too. They’re right. My perspective from a provider point of view is the same as theirs. 

 
 

You’re overthinking this. Find a provider you like with a bit more age and experience- like late 30’s or more. By that point they’ve seen pretty much everything

I'd say research providers you are interested in and read their reviews.  You can generally get a good feel from that then reach out and see how they communicate.  If you get a good vibe from the communication set up a meet and chat some more.
Always remember you are the paying customer, and the quality providers will work with you and what you are comfortable with.  The good ones really want to go out of their way to show a good time.  
I have a few I see and I've had some off days myself where I didn't perform like I had hoped and none of them made me feel bad about it. 
Best of luck.  Do your homework and try to vet guys through this site.  There is a lot of good insight here.

I'm a newbie, but I think the key is to look for the option/service called "Erotic Massage." That's what's used on rentmen.com and rentmasseur.com. Then read the profiles and reviews to see whether they're primarily a masseur who gives happy endings versus an escort who does some massage. Also, here on companyofmen.org, go to Daddy's Den > The Deli and search for the provider's name to see whether anyone here has commented on them. If not, you can always ask about them by creating a post called "411 on <provider>", where 411 is shorthand for "information." I've found that the people are responsive, friendly, and supportive. When you find a provider who looks good, send them a text or email, as @McKeeD said, and have a direct conversation.
(I'm seeing my first masseur tomorrow!)

I'm a newbie, but I think the key is to look for the option/service called "Erotic Massage." That's what's used on rentmen.com and rentmasseur.com. Then read the profiles and reviews to see whether they're primarily a masseur who gives happy endings versus an escort who does some massage. Also, here on companyofmen.org, go to Daddy's Den > The Deli and search for the provider's name to see whether anyone here has commented on them. If not, you can always ask about them by creating a post called "411 on <provider>", where 411 is shorthand for "information." I've found that the people are responsive, friendly, and supportive. When you find a provider who looks good, send them a text or email, as @McKeeD said, and have a direct conversation.
(I'm seeing my first masseur tomorrow!)

I'm a newbie, but I think the key is to look for the option/service called "Erotic Massage." That's what's used on rentmen.com and rentmasseur.com. Then read the profiles and reviews to see whether they're primarily a masseur who gives happy endings versus an escort who does some massage. Also, here on companyofmen.org, go to Daddy's Den > The Deli and search for the provider's name to see whether anyone here has commented on them. If not, you can always ask about them by creating a post called "411 on <provider>", where 411 is shorthand for "information." I've found that the people are responsive, friendly, and supportive. When you find a provider who looks good, send them a text or email, as @McKeeD said, and have a direct conversation.
(I'm seeing my first masseur tomorrow!)

The GirlScout-outfitted dude may accept all tickling cookies. You need to get the cookies on side, though.

I am an older guy, still in good shape, working out twice a week, reasonably presentable, and easy to talk to. But I'm really self-conscious about my sexual ability. I was successfully treated for prostate cancer 10 years ago. I can have an orgasm but I don't ejaculate. I can still get hard, though typically with the help of a cock ring or ED pill. Even when I don't stay really hard for long, it still feels great. It takes a while for me to climax, and sometimes I don't get there. I'm happy to bottom; I like toys. But it's been a long time since I had sex with anyone, and it's time for me to experience physical intimacy again.
So how do I find a provider who will have the patience that I need? I don't want to seem like "a lot of work." Maybe I should start with someone who does erotic massage, where they're accustomed to taking their time (and oil sounds like fun!). Eventually, I'd like to find someone to play with, so he's having a good time, too.
I feel as if that's a lot to explain when contacting a provider, a bit much to leave in voicemail, but this forum is filled with the advice to be very clear when contacting someone. So how do I manage that?