Luv2play

Having attended four (or maybe its five) pool parties, I think one of the great things is that since there are no photos, the cell phones are not seen and the guests are actually talking to each other. The only time I saw phones out was for individuals to exchange contact info.

I may not ever be able to join in real life, or yet be the "core demographic," (those days are coming very soon ?), but I sure wouldn't mind hanging out with a bunch of guys comfortable in their skin, no matter their age, and have a good time. That's beautiful! I enjoy reading about the event and commend all who organize and orchestrate it. The build up and excitement, as well as the reports of the weekend's camaraderie and fun, sure make me wanna join in! One can hope! Thanks for sharing, guys.

I’ve been feeling the same way since the site went off my screen. I only tried it this evening after 2 days being blank and it was back as if it had never been away, except for Orin’s explanation. All I had to do was login again and my email and password sufficed.
Great to see everyone is still around.

Tried to log In Monday night in Australia and no find. Again during our Tuesday. Sinking feeling - its gone.....
 
So happy to see it alive and well on wednesday morning Sydney time.
 
Much appreciate the work you do for us all

Isolated and distraught through the pandemic, this forum became my refuge. Although I do not know anyone in person, just reading through comments, discussions gave me a feeling of being connected with a community. When the site disappeared for a day, I missed a heartbeat. Like I lost someone to the pandemic. So glad we are back now. Heartfelt thanks to those who made it happen.

I had a client fall in love with me, well I say love but I think he was just infatuated. I was the first guy he ever had sex with and I think after about 5 visits I could tell he was becoming obsessed and it wasn’t a healthy provider / client relationship.
 
I’d get lots of messages from him saying how much I meant to him etc. It became really difficult to manage and I think I should have been a bit more blunt at the beginning to say I didn’t feel the same way but he was really nice and I didn’t want to hurt his feelings. I couldn’t say “look this is a transaction, I like you but I only have sex with you because you’re paying me” which is of course true but very difficult to say when someone is infatuated and reads the passionate sex for more than it is.
 
I started to distance myself by being unavailable when he wanted to book, and not engaging much with his messages. Eventually the contact reduced and fortunately he moved abroad but I still get the occasional message.
 
Since I started doing sex work it’s the single most difficult thing I had to deal with and I really don’t think I know how to deal with a similar situation if it happens again. We all want clients to feel attractive and desired but it’s so easy for a client who may be looking for a relationship to confuse that professional response for genuine attraction and a willingness to start a relationship.

I’ve been feeling the same way since the site went off my screen. I only tried it this evening after 2 days being blank and it was back as if it had never been away, except for Orin’s explanation. All I had to do was login again and my email and password sufficed.
Great to see everyone is still around.

When Lucky told me first thing this morning that the site had disappeared with no explanation, I wondered what to do with my day. So I did some chores, shopped for essentials, changed the beds, did three loads of laundry, watched some TV, and finally finished all the work on my taxes. All the while I had a kind of empty feeling in my stomach, which wasn't assuaged by going to a neighbor's home for drinks and dinner. Would I have to get through tomorrow, and the next day and the next, with the same kinds of mundane activities? When I got home this evening, opened my email, and found the message from Lucky that the site was back, a weight was lifted from my spirit: one of the most dependable pleasures of my daily routine had been restored!
 
Thank you, RadioRob and Orin?

This thread may get longer than the Litany of All Saints -as perhaps it should- but here's to adding my thanks to all those who joined in to save the forums. After that glitch from a week or two ago, when the site was inaccessible for some hours, today's vanishing act got me quite concerned. You've now helped with my medical expenses, since I won't need to double-dose my heart meds, and can cancel the request for antidepressants. A generous effort by all involved, and no small feat of technical prowess. My sincere congratulations and heartfelt gratitude to all of you!

I looked at various parts of this new incarnation of the forum. Everything I looked at seems intact the way it was using the other site address.
 
I find it astonishing that you were able to make the transition so quickly and without any apparent issues.
 
Thank you very much.
 
Job well done.

Wonderful work getting the site rescued and rehomed so quickly! I was worried the old server would go offline and the site would be memory-holed with nobody having the credentials to do anything but start over. Not the way you intended to spend your Monday, I'm sure!
 
Thanks for your quick response!

I was terrified all day thinking "Ok, it's over".
You guys are the best, and thanks to the "Washington Team" as well, whoever they are.
Without them it seems like this could have not been possible.
THANK YOU!

@Orin & @RadioRob
 
Great job guys. You accomplished a lot in just under 12 hours. Kudos!
 
~Boomer~

Absolutely not. In terms of access, there is nothing different in terms of security or in terms of what big brother can see/do. We'll eventually have both domains. But for now, until we get control of DNS, I have a redirect in place on Daddy's server to push everyone over here. Once we have control of m4m-forum.org's DNS itself, I can have it come directly here.
 
Eventually both domains will just work equally with no difference.

@Orin and @RadioRob Thank you! I thought the site was gone...

This site is now running on a different server. So if something happens to Daddy's server, the forums itself will survive. It's now in a different home.

Great team work for the rescue. Thank you all.

We're lucky in that we were able to save EVERYTHING. Thanks to the work of Orin and "Team Washington", they were able to get root level access to the server. That allowed me to export the entire forum entirely as-is and move it to a new server.
 
I have not had a chance to export other sites such as the review site. I'll attempt to work on that later.

I don't know what any of that means, but COOL! :cool:

Early this morning, something happened at the hosting company, and the site fell through a wormhole. I'd been talking with @RadioRob about it yesterday, and contacted him. For most of the day, he's been busy rescuing the site. Since he couldn't get it to work on the old server, he copied it to another one, and set up a new URL, M4M-forum.org to point to it. Now that it's working in its new home, the old site re-directs to the new one, where you should be now. Please bookmark the new URL.
 
Once we have updated the DNS entries for the old site's URL to point to the new server, the redirect will no longer be needed and the old server can be relinquished. There is other work to do for moving the review site.
 
All of this means that it is time to decide who will own and run this place.

I retired at 50 because 1) I was able to financially, and 2) while there were many things about my job I liked, such as international travel and working with interesting people in a high pressure environment, there were things I didn't like such as 1) having to be discreet about being gay and having not enough time to myself to enjoy things I like such as reading ,travel on my own account to places I wanted to go to and doing other things with my time in fields I enjoy.
 
23 years later I have absolutely no regrets. My life after retiring from a job I had for 25 years has opened so many perspectives and experiences I never would have had had I stayed working. I could live where I wanted, which I took advantage of, join organizations I could give time to on a volunteer basis and thereby meet people of similar interests, and do things like collect art and books, which takes time to do.
 
Every day I wake up with a list of things to do, projects I am involved in that will culminate in something worthwhile and lasting, and a sense that I belong to a community that does not just have the common interest of receiving a pay cheque.
 
Oh, and I have a wonderful pension, fully indexed to inflation. So no complaints here. I realize I am a lucky guy and therefore try to share the good things I enjoy.

I retired at 50 because 1) I was able to financially, and 2) while there were many things about my job I liked, such as international travel and working with interesting people in a high pressure environment, there were things I didn't like such as 1) having to be discreet about being gay and having not enough time to myself to enjoy things I like such as reading ,travel on my own account to places I wanted to go to and doing other things with my time in fields I enjoy.
 
23 years later I have absolutely no regrets. My life after retiring from a job I had for 25 years has opened so many perspectives and experiences I never would have had had I stayed working. I could live where I wanted, which I took advantage of, join organizations I could give time to on a volunteer basis and thereby meet people of similar interests, and do things like collect art and books, which takes time to do.
 
Every day I wake up with a list of things to do, projects I am involved in that will culminate in something worthwhile and lasting, and a sense that I belong to a community that does not just have the common interest of receiving a pay cheque.
 
Oh, and I have a wonderful pension, fully indexed to inflation. So no complaints here. I realize I am a lucky guy and therefore try to share the good things I enjoy.

I fully admit that I am overgeneralizing, though PERA actually is not just a teacher pension in Colorado but applies to many state and local government employees as well. Both my mom and sister work for local/state governments and also get PERA.
 
So apologies if this does not apply to your pension. The rules I am speaking about are federal rules. But it sounds like maybe certain states/pensions have different set-ups to avoid those federal provisions.
 
In general my main point was that many (though clearly not all) people who get a pension are paying into that pension at a higher rate than people without pensions pay into social security. In Colorado we pay 8.75% of our paychecks into PERA, whereas a Coloradan without PERA would only pay 6.2% into Social Security. So overall, those of us with jobs contributing to this pension are taking home less per paycheck in exchange for likely having more robust pension payments in retirement.
 
Again this is just my experience with my job/pension. Just making the point with people saying, "Oh you're so lucky to have a pension," that part of having that pension (for me at least) is taking home less pay every single paycheck than I would if I had an identical paying job that only contributed to Social Security.
 
Don't get me wrong, I am glad I have that pension, but in my case there is some lost income now for more money in retirement later.

My father worked in academia for the last 30 years of his working life. Prior to that, much to the chagrin of his family, he was a Union organiser. My mother returned to work when I, the youngest, was in school full time. She retired about 25 years later as a commodities trader. My father received a low six figure lump sum in lieu of pension from his Union days, and monthly checks from TIAA-CREF, which survived him, and were then paid to my mother. My mother received a small pension from the first company she worked for (just about $600 a month), plus her 401K, which when she passed had just about a $55K RMD. Both received social security. They had a comfortable retirement, traveled to Europe every year for a few months visiting family, stayed out East every September, spent money fixing up/redecorating their homes, etc.. Unfortunately, they did not have long retirements. I encouraged them both, and especially my mother after my father passed, to spend the money and enjoy life. I like to think they did, but it does sadden me a bit when I think of what they didn’t get to do.
 
As for me, I have no pension from any company I’ve ever worked for. I have a healthy 401K, an IRA, plus my own investments and savings. Like I said in a previous post, I don’t care what’s left when I’m gathered to my forebears, as long as there’s enough to tip the gravediggers. My family knows not to expect anything as I fully intend to enjoy every minute I have on this earth - but whatever may be left is earmarked for my godchildren, a few friends if they survive me, and a few charities.

Not a good first impression, I will grant you, but not what I would call a bad experience. On a scale from 1 to 10, with 10 being the worst kind, hair raising, fear for my life bad experience - inability to establish communications with a companion is pretty much a 0 in my book. It's the cost of doing business. If you can't accept that, you will not enjoy this hobby.