In Fourteen Hundred And Ninety-Two Columbus Sailed The Ocean Blue

[Guy Fawkes]

As Grandma said: "You slow down until you can handle it." I'm not that far behind you.

 

As I've shared before. I have arthritis in both knees. And it became worse February of last year. It got so the only place I'd drive was to the doctor's office. In between I'd start my car up once a week. Late April of this year when I went out to the parking lot I fell down. Someone saw me and called the rescue squad and they got me back into my apartment (on a gurney). I order groceries online but the store does not deliver. My landlord brings them to me (and puts them away). I have a rent mail box in the same shopping center and he brings me my mail also.

 

My doctor told me that knee surgery is not an option.

 

I have other ailments. Diabetes for 10+ years. That stopped my sex life. It killed my mother in her 50s. Although her mother lived into her 80s it cost her both legs (amputated below the knees). I have diabetic neuropathy (toe pain), high blood pressure, gout etc.. I take a dozen plus meds. Plus daily insulin shots.

 

I've not had a haircut now in 3.5 years. I stopped shaving several months ago; I can't stand up that long. I have a bathtub / shower but can't step into it and even if I could I would not be able to stand that long. I take "spit baths".

 

My apartment is long and narrow. Bedroom at one end and kitchen at the other. Living room in the middle. I can't walk from one end to the other without stopping to sit in the living room.

 

After I fell I signed up for Life Alert.

 

Life goes on! C'est la vie!

[+ WilliamM]

As I've shared before. I have arthritis in both knees. And it became worse February of last year. It got so the only place I'd drive was to the doctor's office. In between I'd start my car up once a week. Late April of this year when I went out to the parking lot I fell down. Someone saw me and called the rescue squad and they got me back into my apartment (on a gurney). I order groceries online but the store does not deliver. My landlord brings them to me (and puts them away). I have a rent mail box in the same shopping center and he brings me my mail also.

 

My doctor told me that knee surgery is not an option.

 

I have other ailments. Diabetes for 10+ years. That stopped my sex life. It killed my mother in her 50s. Although her mother lived into her 80s it cost her both legs (amputated below the knees). I have diabetic neuropathy (toe pain), high blood pressure, gout etc.. I take a dozen plus meds. Plus daily insulin shots.

 

I've not had a haircut now in 3.5 years. I stopped shaving several months ago; I can't stand up that long. I have a bathtub / shower but can't step into it and even if I could I would not be able to stand that long. I take "spit baths".

 

My apartment is long and narrow. Bedroom at one end and kitchen at the other. Living room in the middle. I can't walk from one end to the other without stopping to sit in the living room.

 

After I fell I signed up for Life Alert.

 

Life goes on! C'est la vie!

 

My guess is you have received too much advice on how you could improve your situation, so I will not do it too.

 

Very best to you as a valuable and nice person.

[paulsf]

There are personal home care givers that can come in and help with hygiene, housework, cook a meal or two.

They are extremely helpful with people in your situation.

[+ Avalon]

There are personal home care givers that can come in and help with hygiene, housework, cook a meal or two.

They are extremely helpful with people in your situation.

 

I hope things don't get that far,

 

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

 

I don't cook; never really did. I use the microwave oven. I'm afraid if I used the stove and I fell I could burn the apartment down.

 

I try to have a routine. I force myself to stay up until 11PM. And then not finally get up until 8AM. Of course there are several trips to the bathroom during the night. I try to eat only two meals a day - in the morning and late afternoon. I try not to drink any thing after 6PM so I won't have to get up so often at night. After I eat I get so sleepy I doze off.

 

And bowel movements. ;-))) Every other day. But it does not come naturally. I eat some sugar free candy and then an hour or so later it kicks in. And once it starts I have to hit the john three or four times during the next couple of hours.

 

After I fell I really panicked for awhile, I was scared, but no matter how bad I think I have it I know that there are people worse off than I am. Never despair!

[MikeBiDude]

I hope things don't get that far,

Agreed. OK, but some “tough love” now. I’ve read your posts over the last few months about your living conditions, of course feel for your situation....and I hope you’re ok.

 

I've not had a haircut now in 3.5 years. I stopped shaving several months ago; I can't stand up that long. I have a bathtub / shower but can't step into it and even if I could I would not be able to stand that long. I take "spit baths".

 

This is a bit scary though...venturing into Howard Hughes territory. Are you sure it’s not time to be open minded and research options for some in home care?

[+ Avalon]

Agreed. OK, but some “tough love” now. I’ve read your posts over the last few months about your living conditions, of course feel for your situation....and I hope you’re ok.

 

 

 

This is a bit scary though...venturing into Howard Hughes territory. Are you sure it’s not time to be open minded and research options for some in home care?

 

After I fell I looked into about a care facility but nothing seemed feasible. I called the County Conservator's Office; they wouldn't help. I called the County Department of Social Services APS (Adult Protective Services); they said they's call me back. They never did. I heard on the radio about a group that helps people find a care facility. I called them in early March. They got info from my doctor. I called them two months later to see what was going on. Nothing.

 

But when / if my landlord can no longer help me - he's 20 years older than I am - I'll look into getting someone to help me at home.

[MikeBiDude]

After I fell I looked into about a care facility but nothing seemed feasible. I called the County Conservator's Office; they wouldn't help. I called the County Department of Social Services APS (Adult Protective Services); they said they's call me back. They never did. I heard on the radio about a group that helps people find a care facility. I called them in early March. They got info from my doctor. I called them two months later to see what was going on. Nothing.

 

But when / if my landlord can no longer help me - he's 20 years older than I am - I'll look into getting someone to help me at home.

Understood, and to be clear my comment/recommendation was directed towards “in home” care, not a facility where you would need to leave the apartment that you’re obviously comfortable in

[+ Avalon]

Understood, and to be clear my comment/recommendation was directed towards “in home” care, not a facility where you would need to leave the apartment that you’re obviously comfortable in

 

Thanks again. If need be I'll see into it. Be nice to have someone cut my hair.

[+ WilliamM]

Agreed. OK, but some “tough love” now. I’ve read your posts over the last few months about your living conditions, of course feel for your situation....and I hope you’re ok.

 

 

 

This is a bit scary though...venturing into Howard Hughes territory. Are you sure it’s not time to be open minded and research options for some in home care?

 

@Avalon, I believe you have a birthday soon. Most barbers would be willing to come to your apt for haircut on that day, or soon after.

 

I wait too long between haircuts too.

 

A comment today from Dick Cavett in the New York Times:

 

 

 

Watching my old shows, the odd sensation about it is, there I am sitting with Lucille Ball or someone like that, and it is overlain by the thought, "One of us is dead."

 

"So far it's always the other one."

[+ Avalon]

@Avalon, I believe you have a birthday soon. Most barbers would be willing to come to your apt for haircut on that day, or soon after.

 

I wait too long between haircuts too.

 

A comment today from Dick Cavett in the New York Times:

 

 

 

Watching my old shows, the odd sensation about it is, there I am sitting with Lucille Ball or someone like that, and it is overlain by the thought, "One of us is dead."

 

"So far it's always the other one."

 

When I was a school boy and and later working I got a regular haircut. In high school there was a dress code. After my senior year it was dropped. I was the last to get a haircut under the old rules. One boy couldn't participate in the graduation because he refused to get a haircut. It wasn't long at all; barely touching his ears.

 

I used to take a daily walk. I went past a hair salon. One day a woman came out and asked me if I wanted a free cut. I said yes. That was my last haircut. I did give a tip.

[paulsf]

Your doctor has to have access to social welfare offices. Your insurance company can help set up in home care.

In home care doesn’t have to be medical help. Just a helping hand.

[+ Avalon]

Your doctor has to have access to social welfare offices. Your insurance company can help set up in home care.

In home care doesn’t have to be medical help. Just a helping hand.

 

Thanks but as I've said I have my landlord right now. I hate to bother him too often so I have him pick up groceries and sundries once a month. I stock up on non perishables and supplies.

 

I had always got my rent check in early. He called me in mid July to see how I was doing (he last brought groceries at the end of June). He then came by and brought my mail. I gave him my August rent check. When he was here last week bringing groceries and mail (this was 2 August) an upstairs neighbor came down and gave him his rent check. I don't have to worry now if mine is a little late getting to him. He knows I'm unable to mail it to him.

[Guy Fawkes]

You may want to read this thread: https://www.companyofmen.org/threads/anyone-using-sous-vide-to-cook.137980/page-3#post-1556601. It's be helpful for me here in the desert.

 

I hope things don't get that far,

 

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

 

I don't cook; never really did. I use the microwave oven. I'm afraid if I used the stove and I fell I could burn the apartment down.

 

I try to have a routine. I force myself to stay up until 11PM. And then not finally get up until 8AM. Of course there are several trips to the bathroom during the night. I try to eat only two meals a day - in the morning and late afternoon. I try not to drink any thing after 6PM so I won't have to get up so often at night. After I eat I get so sleepy I doze off.

 

And bowel movements. ;-))) Every other day. But it does not come naturally. I eat some sugar free candy and then an hour or so later it kicks in. And once it starts I have to hit the john three or four times during the next couple of hours.

 

After I fell I really panicked for awhile, I was scared, but no matter how bad I think I have it I know that there are people worse off than I am. Never despair!

[+ Avalon]

You may want to read this thread: https://www.companyofmen.org/threads/anyone-using-sous-vide-to-cook.137980/page-3#post-1556601. It's be helpful for me here in the desert.

 

Thank-you!

 

I have learned to cook both eggs and a steak in the microwave oven.

[+ WilliamM]

Your doctor has to have access to social welfare offices. Your insurance company can help set up in home care.

In home care doesn’t have to be medical help. Just a helping hand.

 

@Avalon I realize the changes are perhaps too much. Please remember though when you absolutely need them.

Edited August 6, 2018 by WilliamM

[+ WilliamM]

Your doctor has to have access to social welfare offices. Your insurance company can help set up in home care.

In home care doesn’t have to be medical help. Just a helping hand.

 

Yes, there are many possible ways for @Avalon, since we know he has a computer. He might start with several other doctors taking a look at his health, especially his knees.

 

I foeget sometimes how how far we have advance medically since my parents and grandparents.

[+ bigjoey]

After I fell I looked into about a care facility but nothing seemed feasible. I called the County Conservator's Office; they wouldn't help. I called the County Department of Social Services APS (Adult Protective Services); they said they's call me back. They never did. I heard on the radio about a group that helps people find a care facility. I called them in early March. They got info from my doctor. I called them two months later to see what was going on. Nothing.

 

But when / if my landlord can no longer help me - he's 20 years older than I am - I'll look into getting someone to help me at home.

 

Here in Kansas City, there are different non-profits that could help. Meals OnWheels and similar ones deliver hot meals. Jewish Family Services, Lutheran Family Services, Catholic Family Services, etc provide home services like housekeeping and home healthcare (the services are partly government funded and are by geographic area and not by the religion of the founders). There are transportation services that provide door-to-door service.

 

Depending on your finances, you are clearly a candidate for “assisted living” which is much different than a “nursing home.” Assisted living is like apartment living with services provided to fit your needs. Here in Kansas City, there are accommodations made for people who can not fully pay.

 

Good luck.

[+ bigjoey]

What they do have a responsibility to do is recognise the inherent disadvantage that POC suffer because of past discrimination, and the inherent advantage they have because of they way that discrimination caused society to be structured. Yes, individuals have responsibility, but it's delusional to think that there is now a level playing field. Certainly there is individual disadvantage that occurs within ethnic groups, but there is also systemic disadvantage that is structural. It's not as simple as telling the people who face this disadvantage that overcoming it is all down to them. Our forbears created the society that this happens in because it suited us, to refuse to acknowledge that is an act of historical blindness. (This acceptance is a separate issue from anything that might be done to redress it.)

 

There seems to be structural, systemic disadvantage built into many societies that affect one group or another. For example, in many societies where religion/ethnicity/POC is not an issue, there is a structural disadvantage to being female. In societies that are in theory “class free” like Communist ones, non-party members are disadvantaged. Studies have shown that “beautiful people” seem to have advantages in how they are treated. In “gay culture” there seems to be an advantage to being young over being old (a younger gay friend of mine was complaining how once he hit 40, he became invisible in gay bars; of course, HE was looking for a younger, hot date ).

 

Absolutely correct to recognize the existence the various advantages that one group has over another be it because of ethnicity, sex, beauty, party membership, family wealth, youth, etc. Most societies have some structure that advantages one group over another. What appears to be a homogeneous society from the outside will usually have nuanced sub-groups that provide advantages to some over another.

 

The key is to recognize that these differences exist and how to address it which you note is a different subject. Today, the solutions seem to amplify the differences we have to give preferences to one group over another (the law suit against Harvard by Asian groups complaining about quotas for other groups that disadvantage them).

 

I think it is important that while recognizing the structural disadvantages of POC in our society, to remember that they are not the only group facing such disadvantages and realizing that is the way most societies seem to be structured and to look for solutions to lift people up and give them the opportunity to become the best they can be. How do we get more Oprah success stories? What is it that lets some people overcome the structural disadvantages they have and become successful?

[+ WilliamM]

Perhaps @Avalon needs just one knowlegable person to help with everything. It could be the director of a senior center. I do understand how difficult that first visit or phone call is for everyone.

[+ WilliamM]

Here in Kansas City, there are different non-profits that could help. Meals OnWheels and similar ones deliver hot meals. Jewish Family Services, Lutheran Family Services, Catholic Family Services, etc provide home services like housekeeping and home healthcare (the services are partly government funded and are by geographic area and not by the religion of the founders). There are transportation services that provide door-to-door service.

 

Depending on your finances, you are clearly a candidate for “assisted living” which is much different than a “nursing home.” Assisted living is like apartment living with services provided to fit your needs. Here in Kansas City, there are accommodations made for people who can not fully pay.

 

Good luck.

 

I went through this with my mother. My response: right now, @Avalon does not need meals on wheels or assisted living, but he will in the future. It all depends on medical care: is it really true that knee replacement is not possible?

 

He needs a friend or relative now, not just a landlord.

[+ Avalon]

I have no close relatives. All my friends have died or moved away. When I was in the hospital in 1999 I had visitors every day. When I was in the hospital in 2006 only two people called me every day; they have since both died.

 

I have a 101 year old aunt in hospice care I call every month. And a friend in a nursing home in another state I call once a month.

 

My best friend lived @40 miles away but he died several years ago.