Questions About Strip Club Protocol....

[doctordoctor]

....thanks for your time helping this newbie...have never been to a male strip club, but was at female ones in college (with friends)...could you give me some idea of topics to talk about with the male stripper who may come by and be looking for business?...I hate small talk (with anybody) so need hints on that...I do know it's all about how much money you'll spend there...I also know to relax and have a good time...another question: I know lap dances are entirely optional, but what really happens and needs to happen?...they vary from club to club, apparently, but does the customer actually try to climax in five minutes or whatever?...or just get hard and wiggle around a bit?...communication about expectations beforehand, I know, is key from reading here on the board...and there are various rules depending on locale...always nervous in situations like these, so need help to know what's going on...any advice greatly appreciated...

[+ Lucky]

Well, in LA recently, a female stripper stabbed a customer who turned down a lap dance with her. So protocol is very important!

A smile goes a long way, as does a fat wallet. After that, you're on your own!

[jakobsen]

Having been a first timer once upon a time, I will say that with time you'll get the hang of it. At least from my experience in Montreal, most lap dances start with a chat at the bar or table. A good dancer will go through a list of "talking points" such as where you're from, what do you do, if you like your job, if you have a BF or GF, etc. The chat leads to an invitation to go to the back room; you are in no way obliged to accept the invitation but, if you do, you should already be acquainted with the dancer. He'll compliment you, such as you look young for your age or you're in great shape, etc. Return the compliment, treat the dancer well and you'll have a fun time. A word in your ear: do not leave it up to the dancer to count the songs. No matter how horny you get, count the songs and, just to let the dancer know that you're keeping tabs, once in a while ask him if this is the start of the 5th song?

 

BTW, my first dance was in Montreal from the famous Brandon/Branden of Campus. He was very GQ/A&F looking, almost untouchable. I took the nerve to ask him for a dance. I couldn't get him off my mind later that evening and always went back to Campus to see him.

[+ newatthis]

A lot depends on what city you're visiting -- you didn't say. If it's Montreal, I would start by reading the excellent posts in the Male Strip Clubs FAQ by YFSC. In a few details (very few, actually) they are out of date (e.g. West Side is now a female strip club), but they will help alleviate a lot of your anxiety. Nervous as I was during my first trip to Montreal, I was still a thousand times less nervous because I had YFSC's detailed descriptions to help me visualize the physical layout of the clubs and what to expect before I got there.

 

Next you can wade through the many other posts about Montreal in the Strip Club forums. I know I'm asking you to invest a lot of time in reading, and I am aware that some of these posts contradict others, but by the time you're finished you'll feel a lot more familiar with what goes on and the differing reactions and strategies visitors have. Don't feel intimidated by the banter and or apparent expertise of some of us -- we were all first-timers at some point, and we all came to feel at ease and at home in the Montreal clubs.

 

Once you've done that, if you post specific questions or descriptions of what you are looking for, there are many of us who will be glad to help out.

 

Finally, you might want to post in the travelling hoovillians section the dates you're planning to be there. When all is said and done, meeting up with someone else who already knows the ropes is the best way to get good guidance.

 

If your destination is Montreal and you invest some time preparing, I guarantee you're going to love it.

[Samai139]

Totally agree with the comments made so far.

1. Read as much as you can about the Montreal Strip Bars, if that's your destination, before you go.

2. If possible go with another person who has been to the bars or

meet somebody there who has had experiences--relieves a lot of anxiety.

3. Window shop a lot--enjoy the "eye candy" before you do anything

more engaging.

4. Trust your instincts and your attractions. We all have our own

individual "buttons"--you'll know when you see someone you want to spend money on.

5. Talk to the waiters, bartenders and the dancers about anything and everything--just being friendly and approachable will help a lot.

6. Try NOT to be too obvious about this being your first time in a strip bar, or in Montreal, or wherever. You don't have to lie, but you don't have to offer that much information either.

7. Most of all---have fun and remember that the bars and the dancers will still be there the next time you visit.

[fedssocr1]

Don't be afraid to just sit and observe the goings-on. The dancers are usually pretty good about honing in on the fresh meat and many will probably approach you. As others have noted, look friendly and smile at the guys who have the look you like. It probably also helps if you dress nice...not jacket and tie nice, but look like some one who won't mind spending a little money on the right guy. If you are at all outgoing chat up some one who looks like a regular and you can get the details. Lots of people here have way more experience than I do, and the advice here is very sound.

 

My first experiences were at Remington's in Toronto several years ago. I enjoy going there to watch people. My luck is usually that the guys I am the least interested in descend on me, while the boys I like best don't pay much attention so sometimes it takes a little more work to corral them than I'd like.

 

You mentioned you don't like small talk. There will definitely be a number of dancers who are also not into small talk who will just come up to you and the first thing they will do is ask if you want a dance. I prefer the guys who put a little more effort into it. And I like to feel comfortable with the guy before going for a dance. I find that gay strip clubs seem more friendly than what I have seen of bars with dancing girls. Not that I have personal experience with those, just what I have seen on TV and in the movies. Maybe it has something to do with it being all men instead of guys ogling over women that has a weird power dynamic to it. Maybe some one should do a sociological study.

 

As for what goes on in a dance I suppose it depends a lot on the club as well as the dancer involved. Don't expect to be having full sex although I think that does go on in some places. My Remington's experiences have varied between simple groping to pretty hot and heavy kissing, sucking, and stroking of the dancer. Only a couple of dancers have ever done much undressing of me but a few have stroked me some. The nice thing about Remington's is that they have private booths so you can get away with all sorts of stuff you can't do in other places. If you have a good time with your dancer and are so inclined you can always ask if he does "private" performances. I've never had anyone be offended by my asking and many of them are happy to come to your hotel for more in-depth fun. I think most like to go after their shift which is usually too late at night for me so I try to set up an appointment for the following day before their shift. I met with one boy I was very infatuated with from Remington's 4 or 5 times over the course of two short trip to T.O. He claimed I was his first private, but as always you have to take everything you hear with a grain of salt.

 

My time in Montreal last year was very tame. I spent a little time in the back room at Taboo but because of the set up and monitoring things there were fairly tame. I didn't do any dances at any of the other clubs there.

 

Just go and have fun...but it helps to set a budget before you go. Don't feel obligated to do anything (or anyone) you don't want to do.

[+ newatthis]

>You mentioned you don't like small talk. There will definitely

>be a number of dancers who are also not into small talk who

>will just come up to you and the first thing they will do is

>ask if you want a dance. I prefer the guys who put a little

>more effort into it.

 

If there's any general rule about Montreal strip club dancers, it's that someone who puts the moves on you to do a lap dance with no (or even very little) conversation first -- no matter how much he wriggles and jiggles himself against you -- is going to be a major disappointment. I would add that the more such a dancer promises you verbally, the less likely he is to deliver.