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Friday Funnies


jackhammer91406

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Joke of the week (from the SMH)

Nine-year-old Joey was asked by his mother what he had learned in Sunday School.

 

"Well, Mum, our teacher told us how God sent Moses behind enemy lines on a rescue mission to lead the Israelites out of Egypt. When he got to the Red Sea, he had his army build a pontoon bridge and all the people walked across safely. Then he radioed headquarters for reinforcements. They sent bombers to blow up the bridge and all the Israelites were saved.”

 

“Now, Joey, is that really what your teacher taught you?” his Mother asks, dumbfounded.

 

“Well, no, Mum, but, if I told it the way the teacher did, you'd never believe it!”

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Young people having café breakfasts of avocado on toast is a popular thing to criticise them for when they complain about not having enough money to buy a house. I'm sure it's not just here. This picture just popped up on my twitter feed. Avoca is a town in western Victoria, the road sign and the modifications (whether real world or photo-shopped) is brilliant.

 

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The California D.O.T found over 200 dead crows on on California highways recently, and there was concern that they may have died from Avian Flu. A Pathologist examined the remains of all the crows, and, to everyone's relief, confirmed the problem was NOT Avian Flu. The cause of death appeared to be from vehicular impacts. However, during analysis it was noted that varying colors of paints appeared on the bird's beaks and claws. By analyzing these paint residues it was found that 98% of the crows had been killed by impact with motorbikes, while only 2% were killed by cars.

The Agency then hired an Ornithological Behaviorist to determine if there was a cause for the disproportionate percentages of motorbike kills versus car kills. The Ornithological Behaviorist quickly concluded that when crows eat road kill, they always have a look-out crow to warn of danger. They discovered that while all the lookout crows could shout "Cah", not a single one could shout "bike!"

 

TruHart1 :cool:

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tumblr_p721lmQsBf1rodbqco2_r1_400.jpg

(Otto Frederick Rohwedder of Davenport, Iowa, United States, invented the first loaf-at-a-time bread-slicing machine. A prototype he built in 1912 was destroyed in a fire and it was not until 1928 that Rohwedder had a fully working machine ready.)

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