You Cant Blame the Kids?

[GoodFella69]

Sorry, I have no sympathy for parents with severely out-of-control children. If you can’t control them, keep them at home until you can, or better yet, pick a closer spot and drive to your destination. If you can't drive, then don't go until your children will behave appropriately without ruining the experience for other passengers. No one should have to be held hostage at the mercy of a 2-year-old’s wild temper tantrum for hours, especially in a bus, plane or train.

 

Goodfella

[Phil_musc]

Toulouse, I think your case mother will be negotiating sometime in the near future - this is exactly what I am talking about.

 

JJ, it is sad that young parents today would feel the necessity to do what is "cool" in child-raising. The issues here haven't really changed - children are still children and they need to be taught respect, proper behavior, etc. When I was younger (and chafing under the rules of my parents) I thought the same thing about if I was ever a parent I wouldn't be the same way as they were. Well, it worked out that I wasn't a parent but now that I am somewhat (?!) older, I understand where they were coming from. These young and cool parents seem to buy into the "takes a village" mentality - with the result that we all are involved even without asking us if we want to be. Just another way that people fail to take personal responsibility - I know, a really un-cool concept.

[OneFinger]

We take our dogs to obdience school. We ourselves go to classes to learn how to manage our pets. We go to driver training school before we are aloud to drive. Why shouldn't be required to learn the proper parenting skills and get a license before we have kids. What kids are allowed to do in public these days just did not occure when I was a child.

WOW!!

 

Wish I had said that.

 

Couldn't agree more. The problem is with the parents and they should be held accountable. Congrats to the bus driver for exposing the problem.

[seeker630]

We take our dogs to obdience school. We ourselves go to classes to learn how to manage our pets. We go to driver training school before we are aloud to drive. Why shouldn't be required to learn the proper parenting skills and get a license before we have kids. What kids are allowed to do in public these days just did not occure when I was a child.

 

It sounds reasonable - but who decides what is the 'right' way of parenting? I'm sure there are many approaches. We know the behavior we want as the outcome, but could we all agree on how to induce that behavior? And I don't really think most of us want the government telling us how to raise children.

 

My parents believed in corporal punishment, but I've known families that aboslutely did not and yet they produced well-behaved children. Considering the very different personalities of children, I think parenting is as much art as science.

[rvwnsd]

todays young parents feel enlightened and evolved. This self-opinion may be short-sighted, but I hear alot of parents say "I wont make the same mistakes MY parents did". What a disservice to their parents... Are they saying THEY turned out badly ? I dont think so. I believe they just want the image of being modern and "cool"....

 

One could surmise that the way they raise their kids demonstrates how well/not well they turned out.

[jjkrkwood]

It sounds reasonable - but who decides what is the 'right' way of parenting? I'm sure there are many approaches. We know the behavior we want as the outcome, but could we all agree on how to induce that behavior? And I don't really think most of us want the government telling us how to raise children.

 

My parents believed in corporal punishment, but I've known families that aboslutely did not and yet they produced well-behaved children. Considering the very different personalities of children, I think parenting is as much art as science.

 

but it should be Pro-active and NOT absent !

[seeker630]

but it should be Pro-active and NOT absent !

 

Nor argument from me!

[BewareofNick]

Yesterday I was on a bus going home from work. I am seated in the front, and on comes a couple with 2 small kids.

The parents take seats on either side, and each has a child sitting next to them. The kids are having a good ole time, being extremely loud, singing silly songs, stamping their feet, etc. I would say the kids were maybe 3 and 5 years old. The father sat there sleeping, while the mother sat silently with a shell-shocked look on her face.

All the other riders were visibly annoyed and angry at the disruption, but everyone held their tongues and simply looked at each other in amazement...

 

After about 15 minutes of this "circus", the female bus driver screamed "Madam, please CONTROL your kids".... The parents didnt blink, and the noise continues, at which point the bus driver screams "Madam, I told you to control your kids OR get off the bus".... With that I was at my stop and started to exit and said to the driver "you cant blame the kids because Obviously thats how they were raised "...

 

What is your feeling about kid disruptions in public places? This was also a major issue recently on a cross country flight where the parents were arrested I believe for not controlling there kids on the flight. Should the parents be held accountable for their kids behavior?

 

Yes, absolutely. I hope the bus driver put them off the bus. That's the problem woth today's parents. They are so worried about their children's "self esteem" and being their childrens friend that they forget that they are supposed to be parents.

[BewareofNick]

I WAS A HORRIBLE CHILD.

 

Some one sucked the evil right out of me though...

 

If you think there might be any evil left, I would be happy to suck it out for you

[BewareofNick]

This gentleman's parenting advice column appears in the AJC. I find myself agreeing with him more often than not : http://www.rosemond.com

[citylaw1]

I find it depressing that you must take the bus JJ. I absolutely hate the bus anywhere, especially in NYC. And yes, most children are horribly behaved, and so are their parents. For this reason I tend to limit my involvement with the masses these days ... they're overrated.

[orbital sander]

I don't get it. If I acted up in a restaurant as a child, I was taken out of said restaurant, and put in the car, and received some additional "punishment" later. It only happened one time that I recall, and all future visits I behaved, as I loved to go out.

 

These days I am too big for most people to spank, and so I can act as badly as I wish:)