When a bad massage is really bad

[rustyrex]

Sigh....I don't know how I end up with these issues but I'm having the worst luck. Booked a massage and it was awful. Had to call the guy to come get the front door to let me in after I rang the doorbell a few times. The guy was so obnoxious about his "accolades" on the wall, degrees and such that obviously didn't result in actual skill at giving a massage. Not only that, I got renditions of old Bette Midler skits, bad dirty jokes and him insisting on putting his finger in my ass when I kindly told him it wasn't really my cup of tea. Then discussions about 9/11 conspiracy, Hillary being a criminal and how Bernie should be the Pres. Ugh.... then the man had the nerve to tell me he's a big brutal top when he asked what I liked, which is top bunk. Had he said all this in the ad I would have moved on....FAST!!!!

[rvwnsd]

Wow - you seem to have received every single bad experience in one session.

[+ poolboy48220]

Missed the "filthy apartment" checkbox. One guy I saw had flies buzzing around the apartment, LOTS of them, and after the session I realized it was due to the BADLY backed up toilet. Had I been more experienced in hiring I would have left before it was over.

 

I can't stand chatterbox masseurs. A bit of conversation is okay, but all slow & low-key. It just feels odd to give subtle signals that he can go a little further massaging your ass when he's nattering on.

[+ nycman]

I've learned to get up and walk away if the first 15 mintues isn't going well.

 

It NEVER gets any better....only worse.

 

I try to be polite, but usually bad masseurs are clueless and you have to

be direct. "Im sorry, this isn't working for me". Get up. Pay the full fee.

Get dressed. Say goodbye. And put a red "X" in my little black book

next to his name.

[rustyrex]

I've learned to get up and walk away if the first 15 mintues isn't going well.

 

It NEVER gets any better....only worse.

 

I try to be polite, but usually bad masseurs are clueless and you have to

be direct. "Im sorry, this isn't working for me". Get up. Pay the full fee.

Get dressed. Say goodbye. And put a red "X" in my little black book

next to his name.

I think I'll have to take this to heart, I'm too nice though...what do you do when the person giving the massage doesn't even match the picture advertised. I had a massage where the guy used the picture from years ago, when he was sexy as hell. I will say he gave a great massage, but I paid a little extra for a little more...I'll just say I had to close my eyes to get the job done...

[+ BenjaminNicholas]

We got the wrong play, the wrong director, the wrong cast. Where did we go right?'

 

--- Max Bialystock

[bigvalboy]

what do you do when the person giving the massage doesn't even match the picture advertised. ..

 

You don't go in, that's my rule. It's not OK when a masseur or escort misrepresents himself. When you do, you encourage their behavior to continue. A simple, "I'm sorry, but you do not match your pics" will suffice. Turn and walk away. If they come to you, don't let them in. Period...IMO of course.

[+ TylerandAce]

Sorry you had this experience. It gives others who do a good job a potentially bad stigma and that's very unfortunate. Hopefully you were able to give this session a negative review somewhere that will help to squeeze him out of the business eventually.